Thursday, September 10, 2009

Cold Desert

I don't know what happened to make me feel so homesick this week, but I'm having cravings for homecooked casseroles and hot dishes, rock songs my mom used to bug me with, fishing boats and bonfires. I miss being in a community/city/state/region where things just fit and click and match my expectations. Where the minority of people irritate me.

It's been two and a half years in the west, and as much as people rave about the mountains, give me a lake or river any day. I miss Minnesota nice. I miss Cub Foods, G-Will-Liquors, Caribou Coffee, Old Chicago. I miss city parks that aren't crawling with children. I miss college students who aren't parents.

I miss monthly family birthday parties. I miss holidays with big groups of people who have known me since I could blink. I miss taking politics for granted. I miss art museums and concerts and zoos. I miss landings and bridges and ships.

If my thoughts are scattered, its because I am. I'm trying to live in a community/city/state/region where nothing about me fits and everything is an uphill battle. I tell myself it builds character, it's making me firm in my beliefs, its making me a stronger person. And that's true. And growth is painful and all that. But it's exhausting. There is no rest, relaxation, and recuperation, there's only temporary escape.

::sigh::

Anyway, if you haven't been seeing much of me around here lately its because I've taken on my own project over at feministhemes.com. Its not much, but sometimes it makes things seem meaningful, or lets me get junk off my chest in a less personal way. So. There's that.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Subterranean Homesick Blues

Or, a list of differences between Minnesota and Utah:
  • In Minnesota, beer flows like water.
    In Utah, beer tastes like water.
  • In Minnesota, skinny tan girls with perfect hair are in sororities.
    In Utah, they are mothers.
  • In Minnesota, missionaries come about twice a year, and are Jehovah's Witnesses.
    In Utah, missionaries come about twice a month, and are Mormon.
  • In Minnesota, you can find a Catholic, Lutheran, or Baptist church no problem, but have to look hard for an LDS church.
    In Utah, you can find an LDS church on every block, but have to look hard for anything else.
  • In Minnesota, drivers stop at stop signs, red lights, and often yellow lights.
    In Utah, drivers stop if they feel like it.
  • In Minnesota, "sac" is a dirty word.
    In Utah, its what you put your groceries in.
  • In Minnesota, natural disasters include tornadoes, flash floods, and blizzards.
    In Utah, natural disasters include wildfires, mudslides, and red-air days (inversion).
  • In Minnesota, downtown tourist attractions include museums, theaters, a zoo, and a massive shopping mall.
    In Utah, the temple is bigger than the capitol, and is the hub of the city.
  • In Minnesota, rivers are judged by the mighty Mississippi, and lakes are judged by Superior.
    In Utah, rivers are more like creeks, and lakes are more like stinky ponds.
Am I excited to get out of Utah for a few days of R&R in Minnesota? You be the judge.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Revelry

The next Big Day is almost here, and I'm feeling optimistic about the future in both a global and personal sense. The global sense goes pretty much without saying, so I'll let you make of it what you will, recommend Ani's new song, and move on.

In the personal sense, my cases seem to be going well, my faculty seem to get me, and my students seem to tolerate me. I'm on track to propose my thesis this spring, I'm in classes that challenge me to grow as a person, and I've recently realized that I only have three years left in Utah after this semester. Slow and steady is starting to pull ahead.

Over the past couple of years I've had my ups and downs, periods of pride and humility, moments of confidence and hopelessness. I've begun to understand how the old me and new me fit together, and that there are people in my life that will be a part of my life, no matter which me I am at any given time. Three of whom I spent some quality time with in Minnesota over the holidays, and one of whom I'm lucky enough to share a home and two kitties with out here in Utah.

Yes, life is good and has purpose and meaning. I'm where I'm meant to be (in a philosophical sense if not a physical sense...), doing what I'm passionate about, and finding myself along the way. I'm realizing that the journey is as valuable as the destination, whatever that may be.

I leave you now, with a little ditty from my new favorite band. Enjoy.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Decree

The big day is almost here, and I'm feeling reflective. Not just about the campaign, which I've tried to follow carefully for the past twelve months, but about my history as a voting citizen of the United States.



*Knock on wood* This looks to be the first election in which the candidate that I've supported will win. In 2004, I voted for Kerry. In 2006, I voted for Hatch (MN Gov). In 2008, I voted for Hillary. As empowering as it feels to walk into that little booth, its (to put it mildly) a bummer to watch your candidate fade into memory, along with the changes that you were looking forward to.

However, I wouldn't change any of those votes for the world. I thought carefully, I researched the issues, and I monitored the presentation of each of the candidates - particularly in the Democratic Primary and the Presidential Race thus far. Even if my candidate doesn't win, I know what (and who) I believe in, and I know I'm not alone in my beliefs. I know that there are people fighting hard, on both sides, to try to make the world, and our nation, a better place.

And this time, for the first time, it looks like I'm not in the minority.

Well, nationally at least.

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Why I'm Not Watching the Olympics

If you know me at all, you know that I'm not an avid sports fan. At best, I'll sit through a football game for Matt's benefit, but I'm usually asleep by half time. So it probably comes as no surprise that I'm not following the 2008 Summer Olympics in Beijing. However, its not because I'm not interested or because I have better things to do, or any of this guy's reasons.

Let me first say this: the idea of global brother- and sisterhood is beautiful. The notion that we can put aside our differences for "a few shining weeks" and all hold hands and unite under the banner of anything is noble (thanks a lot, Morgan Freeman and Visa). But there are some things that I don't think can, or should, be tolerated or ignored in the name of athletic tradition. I think that we should use this global forum to call attention to the betterment of mankind instead of turning a blind eye to the obvious human rights abuses that are being committed, not only by China, but by a multitude of nations competing in the Olympics.

To begin with, what about China's involvement in the human rights abuses in Tibet, Darfur, and Burma? Or how about China's persistent abuse of its own citizens? Check out this report from Amnesty International on the current status of China's death penalty, justice system, use of torture, violence and discrimination against women, repression of spiritual and religious groups, etc. More recently, China has evicted relocated more than 6,000 Beijing households to make room for Olympic traffic, silenced censored Olympic protesters, and told a little girl she was too ugly put their "country's interest first" by selecting a "smiling angel" to lip-sync during the Olympic opening ceremony.

And its not just China. Mahbooba Ahadgar, the third woman from Afghanistan to ever qualify for the Olympics, went missing in July. Although many feared that she had been kidnapped or killed by extremists who had been threatening her and her family for weeks, she fled the country to seek asylum in Norway. The Afghan Olympic Committee first jailed her family for allowing her to complete in the Olympic, and then threatened to jail her family if she didn't compete in the Olympics.

Women are still banned from Olympic teams in Saudi Arabia and Brunei, but these teams are still allowed to compete. This seems to be in direct contradiction to the International Olympic Committee charter, which states that "any form of discrimination with regard to a country or a person on grounds of race, religion, politics, sex or otherwise is incompatible with belonging to the Olympic Movement." Many people are calling for the Olympic Committee follow through on this statement and bar countries than ban women atheletes from participating. However, many Muslim nations do allow women to compete as long as they remain veiled and have developed specially-designed hijabs for women to wear while they compete.

In a perfect world, we wouldn't have to worry about these issues because they wouldn't exist. In a better world, we would take advantage of this global forum to discuss the issues as they become apparent and hold nations accountable for the way that they treat their citizens. In today's world, the least I can do is turn of my TV, boycott Olympic Sponsors, and share with you the reasons why I'm not watching the Olympics.